Me: Send me a screenshot.
User: How do I do that?
Me: <eye roll> (this is a telephone conversation)
Me: Press the PrintScreen button
User: Where is that?
Me: Above the Insert button
User: Where is that?
Me: (getting aggrivated) Next to Backspace
User: Uhhh, insert...uhh, backspace.  Oh, F12?
Me: No.  PrintScreen. To the right of F12.
User: Um, ok.
Me: Press that button
User: Nothing happened.
Me: Nothing is supposed to happen.  Open a Word doc.
User: Open what?
Me: Open Microsoft Word
User: Okay.  It's a blank screen
Me: Yes, now press the Ctrl button and the letter V
User: Nothing happened.
Me: <sigh>
Me: Did you press the PrintScreen button?
User: No, I couldn't find it.
Me: *mumbling under breath about how I'mma kill this dumb bitch*
Me: It is to the right of F12.  Do you see it?
User: Yes.
Me: Press it.
User: Ok.
Me: Now, press Ctrl and V in Word.
User: Okay.
Me: Now save the document to your desktop and then email it to me
User: How do I do that?
Me: You've never saved a Word Document?
User: No, I've never had to.
Me: BOILING MAD.  I'll just come up there.
 

After 12,905 days on The Rock, one would imagine that a "career" would have been settled on by now.  And yet, rapidly closing in on 12,906, I don't have a full-fledged plan.  Let me cruise down the halls of my memory to see the things I've wanted to be.

• Chemist - I think I wanted to be a chemist before I really even knew what a chemist was.
• Lawyer - I don't even know where I got this idea.
• Veteranarian - This one actually makes sense.  I'm a Sagittarius and very good with animals.
• Architect - Problem.  I tend to think in two dimensions.
• Landscape architect - I still toss that one around every now and again.
• Interior designer - Would you believe that I thought there wouldn't be a market where I was living.  I was that short-sighted! (I was also 15.)
• Web designer - I've got the tools and a little knowledge, but not enough to make it a job.
• English teacher - Then I realized that I'm not a good teacher.  No patience.  Same reason I'm not a doctor.  No patience.  </joke>
• Professional aerialist - I'm just not long and lean enough for this one.  Nor flexible enough.  I could get to the last part, just not the first part.
• Database Administrator - Just recently realizing that I don't think I want to do this one.  Fortunately, it isn't too late to change my focus.  Never is in my case.
• Writer - The things I think are interesting don't really make for interesting reading.  Case in point - this blog.
• Professional Student - This one is my super dream goal.  If we hit the lottery, I'm just going to stay in school and soak up all the knowledge I can get my grubby little hands on.
• Computer programmer - That's where I'm currently leaning.  I like it.  It's easy for me.  We'll see.
• Professional wiseass, aka, bartender - Yeah, family and stuff means that the schedule is just a no-no on that one.

Thanks for listening.  I needed a brain dump.

Well then.  Yesterday, as Lovey and I were enjoying our last day of a long weekend, we decided to go grab a little late lunch.  We had heard from a couple different sources about a new place that had opened up near us.  It's a sports bar which is ALWAYS good for me since you just can never have too many places to go see the Stillers.

I didn't take any photos of the inside, but I kind of wish that I had.  The space really is beautiful.  Some sort of dark wood for the tables and the bar with a HUGE screen TV surrounded by approximately twelve (I didn't count) smaller, but still large screen TVs.

Before I proceed any further, let it be known that I want this place to succeed.  I want to see it jam packed during football season and every other sports season.  I realize that they've been open now for maybe two weeks, but I've also been in the industry and held every position from dishpit to manager so I have a decent idea of the inner workings of a restaurant.  With that said, let's talk about our visit.

Upon our arrival, we wandered in looking for menus to see if we were really going to stay.  None were readily available, and hey, that's okay.  After a few minutes of deer in the headlights, we were approached by who would ultimately be our waitress.  We looked over the menu and decided to stay.

The hostess took the menus from us and led us out to a table after asking if we wanted to sit inside or out and gave us a nice recommendation about where it would be the least breezy.  Once at our table, the hostess returned the menus and our waitress came over.

The waitress, we'll just call her E, asked if she could get us drinks.  I asked what they had on tap and her response was that they didn't have anything on tap.  Okay.  Fair enough.  I probably would have draft beer in a sports bar, but hey, I don't own it and I don't think that the restaurant that previously occupied the building had drafts either.  So, how about bottles?  E replied, "Uh, Bud, Bud Light.  And I think Corona."  Hmmm, you would think one would remember that if there were only three available, but maybe that's just the bartender in me talking.

Taking a pass on the beer selection, I instead asked for a Grey Goose Citron and Sprite.  Lovey asked for a regular Grey Goose and Sprite.  We also ordered calamari.  After a few minutes, E returned with her tray laden with glasses.  In front of each of us she sat down a large drinking glass full of Sprite and a rocks glass full of vodka.  I suppose that I must have made a face because E immediately said, "Oh, should those have gone in the same glass?  I'm not a drinker; I have no idea.  I guess I should have asked." 

Yes, E, you should have.  You also should have specified which glass had the regular vodka and which had the citrus, but maybe your bartender didn't tell you.  Either way, I have my vodka, so I don't complain. 

We placed our order and E was off in a flash.  She was back just as quickly.  "I just wanted to let you know that since I messed up your drinks, there won't be a charge for the Sprite."  Thanks.  You know, since you only charge for the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol in a drink anyway.

The calamari came out and it was very fresh.  I like a little more breading, but that's just me.  It was hot and that's good enough for us.

We played mixologist at the table and E returned.  This time with a joke.  It starts out like this:

"Do you want the good news first or the bad news?"

Lovey offered up bad news.

E told us that she was just kidding and there was no bad news.  BUT, since we were the ONLY PEOPLE ORDERING FOOD, that our food would be out really quickly.

Hey, I'm all about my food getting to the table fast.  I love a kitchen that keeps their ticket times down.  But E, this isn't information that you should really be doling out to the guests.  A simple, your food will be right out is more than sufficient.  I get it, you're new at waiting tables.  I can't hate.  I'm a terrible waitress.  But give me a bar five deep and I'll rock your socks off.  But I digress.

Here comes our food!  Which, by the way, was quite tasty.

Sliders

Lovey had the pork sliders.  He said that they were very good.   Sorry about the photo quality, but the lighting was silly outside that day.

I opted for the mini pepperoni pizza which was equally as good.

Pizza

Neither of us could finish it all, so we asked to have it to go.  Trying to be a little environmentally conscious, we asked to have it put all in one box.

E gave us our check which was not outrageous.  The food was reasonably priced and the vodka was actually very well priced at $9 for top shelp on the rocks.

I gave her a nice tip because, hey, times are tough and she's new.  She'll get better, more than likely.

I do have to say that I was rather disappointed to not have seen a manager in the entire time that we were there.  My personal opinion is that the manager should be working the floor, ensuring quality service for the guests.  Especially when the restaurant is new AND empty.  A 30 second table visit really can do wonders for a dining experience, this I know for fact.

We may give it another shot if we want to go watch a game at some time.  I am hoping that as a little time goes by, they'll be able to work out the kinks and draw a crowd and stay open.

Oh, and I hope that E will come to realize that, when you pack someone's pizza to go, it's just wrong to put it in the box in sandwich manner so I have to be concerned about all the good stuff being on one side of the crust or the other when I go to reheat it.

I'm not going to name the restaurant because I'm not interested in giving them bad press because "all press is good press" doesn't fly in the restaurant business.  And I guess if you lived here you might be able to figure it out, but there are so many new places going up at any given time, even that would be tough.

Best of luck to you.  Your website name cracks me up, by the way.

Salmon?  Orange roughy?  Grouper?  What? Thanks to brownamazon for posting the quiz.

Created by Recipe Star

Tonight, we could the takeoff (sorta) of Space Shuttle Discovery.

IMG_1442

From right off of the balcony.  Had I thought of it earlier, I could've gotten a better shot.  Live and learn. :-)

What question do you hate being asked?

My answer hasn't changed since the last time you asked, Vox.

I'm sure that I've made it clear previously that I feel that the school districts down here, well, suck balls.  Let me relay a tale which proves this point.

First, let me say that I know that my child is not perfect.  She's a normal, sometimes forgetful 15 year old.  I'm over that part.  I'm used to reminding her of things a million times.  About a week and a half ago, she told me that she needed $5.  Of course, it's like pulling teeth, so I have to follow up with 'for what?'.  Long story short, the teacher "made" them all take at least one raffle ticket to sell. (it's a computer class and the raffle would benefit some school sports team of which my child is no part)  Needless to say, she didn't sell it.  This, of course, didn't stop the teacher from still wanting. her. five. dollars!

So, I figured that I would send a note asking why I should give up 5 bucks for something that had nothing to do with this class.  What follows is the teacher's response....I have not edited it at all except to remove my last name.

DEAR MRS. MiamiShyner

SORRY I COULD NOT GET BACK TO YOU SOONER, TOO MANY THINGS AT THE SAME TIME.

LET ME EXPLAINED TO YOU WHY CAYTLIN NEEDS TO BRING THE $5.00.
THE TICKET  IN QUESTION WAS A RAFFLE THAT THE SCHOOL WAS GOING TO HAVE TO LIFT THE STUDENT'S SPIRIT BY GIVING THEM SOME PRICES BEFORE THE F-CAT, AND A WAY TO GET AN EXTRA A FOR THE STUDENTS IN THE INDIVIDUAL CLASSES. CAYTLIN COMMITTED HERSELF TO SALE ONE TICKET. I GAVE ALL OF THE STUDENTS THE OPTION OF RETURNING THE UNSOLD TICKET ON THE DAY DETERMINED BY THE ACTIVITIES DIRECTOR, AND SHE AND OTHER STUDENTS DID NOT BRING THEM ON THAT DAY, I HAD TO PAY $160.00 OUT OF MY POCKET TO MAKE UP FOR ALL THE TICKETS THAT WERE NOT RETURNED ON TIME, AMONG THEM CAYTLIN'S.
SINCE THAT MOMENT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO COLLECT THE MONEY FROM THE STUDENTS THAT DID NOT BRING THE TICKETS, TO MAKE THE ECONOMICAL DEFICIT A LITTLE SMALLER.  AS YOU COULD IMAGINE, THIS WAS THE LAST TIME EVER THAT I WOULD GET INVOLVED IN ANYTHING MONEY RELATED FOR SCHOOL.
I HOPE THAT YOU UNDERSTAND MY SITUATION, AND I THANK YOU FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO EXPLAIN IT.

SINCERELY

MS GARCIA

Ha!  Are you done laughing yet?  Here is my response:

Ms. Garcia,
I appreciate the explanation.  It is my understanding that now you are in possession of the raffle ticket.  If this is correct, and I do believe that it is, despite any misunderstandings I cannot now give you the money for a raffle ticket for which I do not even have in my possession.
I have also been informed that you have now isolated Caitlyn (note spelling) from her friends in the class due to this issue about five dollars.  I find this to be highly unacceptable.  I am sure that, per your own note, there are other children who have not turned in the five dollars, and find it hard to believe that they are all receiving the same treatment from you.  If there is a problem with Caitlyn's classroom behavior, please make me aware of it and I will nip it in the bud from home.  If you feel that you need to discuss something with me, you will find my telephone number located at the bottom of this email.
 
Finally, for your own personal note, typing in all capital letters is equated with yelling.  I will assume that is not the message that you were trying to convey.  I do believe, however, that your means of response should be treated with as much care and consideration as your in-person interactions with parents, and that particularly, as a computer teacher, you would be aware of the social norms of electronic communications.
 
Again, you may feel free to contact me by telephone should you wish to discuss this matter further.
 
Regards,
 
Ms. MiamiShyner

Was I mildly bitchy?  Yes.  But over the top?  Nah.  Did I nearly jump out of my skin and want to slap the living shit out of this woman due to her response below?  HELLZ to the YEAH.

MRS. MiamiShyner

LET ME START BY SAYING THAT THE REASON WHY CAYTLIN HAS BEEN "ISOLATED" FROM HER FRIEND, IS BECAUSE SHE IS NO LONGER WORKING ON HER PROJECTS, SINCE SHE SPENDS ALL THE TIME TALKING TO THE GIRL THAT I MOVED AWAY FROM HER.
REGARDLESS OF WHAT SHE MIGHT THINK, MY PURPOSE IN SCHOOL IS TO HAVE STUDENTS WORKING AND LEARNING, GRANTED THAT THEY HAVE THE CHOICE NOT TO WORK, BUT NOT IF I CAN HELP IT.

ABOUT THE MONEY, THE TICKET THAT WAS RETURNED TO ME IS USELESS BECAUSE THE RAFFLE WAS OVER A MONTH AGO , AND AS I SAID, CAYTLIN TOOK UPON HERSELF THE RESPONSIBILITY OF SALLING THE TICKET BY THE DUE DATE, AND SHE DIDN'T, THE TICKET COULD HAVE BEEN THROWN AWAY BECAUSE IT IS WORTHLESS.
CAYTLIN HAS MADE ME ASK HER FOR THE MONEY FOR A MONTH, AND I DON'T THINK THAT IT IS FAIR FROM YOUR PART TO MAKE ME PAY FOR HER LACK OF RESPONSIBILITY, BUT IF YOU WANT TO DO SO, THEN SO BE IT.

WITH CAPITAL LETTERS IS HOW I WRITE ALL EMAILS TO EVERYBODY, I CAN READ BETTER WHAT I WRITE.

I HOPE THAT CAYTLIN'S COMPLAINTS HAVE BEEN CLARIFIED, AND MINE TOO.

AT YOUR SERVICE

MS GARCIA

Seriously?!?!

• I corrected you that it is MS not MRS if you paid attention.
• Kiddo has been in your class for nearly 27 weeks now and you still cannot spell her name right even though I pointed that out to you too?
• I'm sorry, but I don't care if English isn't your first language.  You need to get some classes under your belt about basic grammar.
• You type in caps because "you can read better what you write"?!?!?!  Are you fucking kidding me?!?!  Are we both professionals here?  Wait, it is obvious that one of us is not.

So, I think I'm just going to post this here and let it go.  Why, you might ask?  Because the person who supervises the teachers, whom I've had the pleasure  opportunity to meet, Dr. Diaz, is going to stick up for Ms. Garcia.  I still might respond though if I'm feeling especially bitchy.

Oh, and why don't you get on your bicycle and ride down the K-12 and see if your five dollars is at the bottom.

"Two faculty... One speaks no English, the other learned English from watching "The Wide World of Sports." So you tell me... Which is better, speaking no English at all, or speaking Howard Cosell?"

I don't know, call me paranoid or just a wimp, but I think this commercial is just weird.

In case you didn't see this, Heinz is doing a special packaging of ketchup.  Pretty neat!

Heinz

Hi there folks.  I'm missing ROCO Fridays and my Fridaylutions, I know.  Things have been a little hectic.  Nevertheless, I wanted to share yet another DHL nightmare with you.

Before we start, let is just be known that I've shipped my fair share of stuff using regular old mail, UPS, and FedEx, and I've never had a problem.  Now, previously I've noted that DHL SUCKS as you may or may not recall. 

Friday was okay.  They tried to deliver while I was at work.  No biggie.  They left a little sticky note on the door saying if I wanted to have the package left for me, to sign the note and leave it on the door.  Well, I knew I wouldn't be home and as much as I complain about where I live, I knew no one would come take the package.

Monday rolled around and Lovey came home to see the note still on the door at just about 5:10.  I checked the website to see what the status was.  Would you believe that they claim to have attempted delivery?  So, while they got the "recipient not home" part right (cuz Kiddo never hears the door) "delivery attempted" is a flat-out LIE.  If you had gotten out of your truck Mr. DHL driver, you would've seen and picked up your stupid sticky note and I wouldn't have had to call some poor guy at DHL to bite his head off.

As DHL does, they promised that it would go out for delivery today.  (I wonder what sort of shipping the sender paid for...)  And I saw that it was out for delivery which is all well and dandy.  Then I see that it's been delivered.  To 1210 SW 32nd Court.  Guess what?  That is not my address.

<SIGH>

So more calls to DHL to see if they're stupid on a whole or if just the driver is stupid.  Turns out it's just the driver, but come on people!  The DHL legacy continues.

UPDATE!!

It seems as though they took my latest nastygram more seriously than any previous one.  Because I received not one, not two, but THREE phone calls to follow up about this issue and the third guy wanted to call me again after he spoke to the driver.  No thanks.  I don't want the guy getting fired.  Times are tough.  I just wanted them to be aware.

Oh yeah, AND they sent an email apologizing as well.  I suppose when you end your note with "GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER! It's no wonder this company is in the crapper."  They take it to heart.